Chronology
CAUTION. SPOILERS. This is an evolving timeline and assumes the reader is fully acquainted with the Subnormality comic storyline to date. Readers who have not read the complete series are strongly advised against consulting this page, as due to its nature, no spoiler will be withheld. Sources and methods This timeline of the events on the world of Subnormality is compiled from three sources: 1) The Subnormality comic itself, presented in normal typeface. 2) Events from real world history, presented in boldface. 3) Events from real world myth and legend, and their approximate dates, presented in italics. Reference links to specific episodes of the comic appear in (parenthesis) following the reference. While the comic presumed to be authoritative in the events that happen in the world in which it takes place, not all events described in Subnormality can happen on the same timeline, i.e. the world blowing apart in the 21st Century precludes any human events happening there in subsequent centuries. Therefore, events that must happen in a parallel world or alternate timeline appear in {fancy brackets}. Events without specific dates are marked with bullet points in their presumed chronological order. 'Continuity' Subnormality plays with many concepts of time travel, alternate worlds and interdimensionality, any or all of which could interfere with keeping a coherent timeline of events. The comic also makes no promise of plot continuity, although more recent episodes involving the main cast have employed a greater amount of it to further the humor, drama and story. And many precise dates are given throughout the comic series. This chronology therefore attempts to present these efforts at continuity as a timeline. Readers should bear in mind that retroactive alteration of events has been presented more than once in the story, and is in fact the motivation for most of the time travelling characters. Ultimately, the continuity of the plot may be up for grabs, even while the philosophic direction of the comic overall may not. Chronology 'BC' Late Pleistocene Era *Whatever else happens at this time, it would be improved by a river of cheese pouring onto it from out of a time machine. (#103) c. 1550-1069 New Kingdom of Egypt (#108) 1508 *Sphynx born (or otherwise comes into existence). (#130) c. 1430–1180 Hittite Empire Period (#108) *At least one time traveler comes down to live in the New Kingdom of Egypt. (#108) 6th Century *Zarathustra calls Sphynx an abomination, so she eats him. (#123) 4th Century? *Oedipus does not think through his answer to the Sphynx's riddle before opening his mouth, and is burned to death by her laser eyes. Jocasta, being the greater monster locally, takes her place guarding the gates of Thebes. (#4) CE 1429 A small troll raises the siege of Orleans, prophetically flying the tricolor which would not become the French flag for another 360 years. He is later burned and a story about a teenage girl from Domremy is made up to make the English look even worse. (#28) 1586 Muscovite bronze master Andrey Chokhov casts the Tsar Cannon for some reason. (#63) Late 18th Century *'Earliest forms of poker spread throughout the Mississippi basin' (#42) 1800s *Underwater breathing apparatuses reach the American West. (#3) *At some point this Century, Raoul and Shamus arrive after having travelled time from 2010, Shamus winning another bet. (#140) 1872 November - Sphynx eats the crew of the Mary Celeste. (#130) 1875 June 7 - Shango the Atomic Cowgirl and Morgan the Talking Mule Inventor fail to pierce the unexamined privilege rampant in Empire City, Nevada, despite her being a Strong Female Character. (#136) 1900s *Neo-Nazi time travelers fail to kill Theodore Roosevelt, who can lift their damn time car over his head and throw it. (#84) 1915 April - Armenian Genocide begins (#72) 1923 29 October - Republic of Turkey declared; end of the Ottoman Empire. (#100) 1930 *Sphynx is in Iran around this time, and no one seems to be Zoroastrian anymore. (#123) 1933 *Adolph Hitler keeps getting harassed by time travellers. (#21) 1938 *'Henry Ford awarded the Grand Cross of the German Eagle for being such an anti-Semitic Nazi booster.' (#10) 1939 August 22 - Hitler orders his death squads to exterminate Poles. (#72) 1943 February 22 - Sophie Scholl executed. (#107) 1944 *Goering approves the Fliegensarg Mk. I for production (#96) 1945 July - "Trinity" test doesn't ignite the Earth's atmosphere after all. (#143) 1950s *John Lennon keeps getting harassed by time travellers. (#183) 1968 *The faking of the Apollo 11 mission is itself faked by the PRC. (#28) 1970 *'Farrokh Bulsara adopts the surname "Mercury".' (#194) 1977 *Big John McCrook goes into the used car trade. (#128) 1978 *The Groper begins his career in supervillainy. (#44) 1985 *General Pete born. (#196) c. 1988 *As a child, Pete, the future lead singer for The Generals, dreams big. (#79) 1990s *Geffen Records invents the character Kurt Cobain, who is performed by a large cast of veteran actors and musicians. (#28) 1990 July 2 - "Ice Ice Baby" released as a single. (#56) 1995 *Steve Parsons enters the cannibal chef industry. (#89 1997 *Mister Austerity begins his career in supervillainy. (#44) 1999 6 April - Buckcherry debut album released. (#196) 2001 26 March - Gorillaz debut album released. (#184) 2002 *'Traudl Junge passes away in old age.' (#107) 2006 *Public Library System merges with Starbuck's. A phasing-out of books is attempted, but was perhaps just slightly premature. (#13) *Napoleon Bonaparte returns from out of time and/or Hell, startling Anneliese and Marie as they finish their lunch. (#20) *Lady Thunder hears one too many thigh jokes on an appearance of "Late Night with Conan O'Brien", and vaporizes his studio audience. Renames herself Lady Thunderkill. (#44) 2007 * {An experiment at the University of Leeds is so ridiculous, the Earth explodes.} (#30) *An internet porn performer takes her online earnings and opens Bluebird Books, a brick-and-mortar general interest bookstore. (#192) *Anneleise goes hunting for a two-bedroom apartment. (#34) *Zobibbibab, the God of Whispers, gets a health spa franchise. (#36) *Certain news boxes are sentient; will take money and then devour customers. (#37) *An artificial intelligence capable of repairing many forms of damage is created in a laboratory, but is malevolent toward anchovies (#41) *The Franklin Mint begins to "assemble" its winter catalogue (#54) *"Supernija Death Fight" (Canada-Sweden, 2007) opens (#47) 7 November - Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare released in North America (#196) *British scientists decide to invent a time machine. (#50) *Letter openers (#51) and fax machines (#52) become woefully scarce. *PHG's spinal column proves it can command a control override of her left arm. (#53) 2008 January 1 - Warp-capable civilizations investigate the source of "Ice Ice Baby". (#56) *Sphynx tries a career in entertainment, beginning with stand-up comedy (#59), though she remains unaware of Jerry Seinfeld (#111). *Raoul releases one of THOSE genies from a soda can. (#61) *Justine inadvertently deliquifies Randy of Randy's Hobby Shop. (#62) *The Tsar Cannon is put to productive use in suburban Canada. (#63) *Atheist Apocalypse occurs, at least to Zoe Muggs and her friend. (#66) *The first Bernard™ shop opens; six months later it is a raging success. (#69) *The Merciless Teoxhi..., a Central American god, hits on PHG. (#70) May 22 - "Indiana Jones and the Huge Paycheque" (Canadian title) opens (#73) *Movie Cone opens for business (#75) *Sphynx suggests that Pizza Hut should consider rebranding (#78); the company decides on Pizza Building (#97). *Raoul and Shamus survive the crash of a TWA flight (#81) *PHG graduates college and starts looking for work (#82) *Neo-Nazi time travelers disrupt traffic in their Time Mercedes (#84) *Sphynx tries telling depressing stories to her prey to ease the pain of being devoured alive. (#85) This is only known to have worked for her the one time. (#100) August *Sphynx tries competing in decathlons. (#86) *Raoul loses his driver's license for drunk driving, and bothers what must be a perfectly harmless young woman in a funny t-shirt at a bus stop. (#87) Because Raoul, through his arrogance, would never inadvertently bite off more than he could chew. *PHG meets Steve Parsons, who invites her to be eaten. Apparently, she doesn't take him up on his offer. (#89) *Sphynx signs on with Central Casting, and lands the role "Diane" on a ZAP Energy Bar commercial. (#92) She is now technically eligible for a SAG card. September 18 - Sixth grader Suzy builds a Frank Sinatra robot that conquers the world in ten days. (#90) *"Ghandi 2" has a network premiere. ZAP Energy Bar ad runs. (#92) *Sphynx eats almost exclusively at Vitalo 24-Hour Fitness Center for awhile. (#97) *PHG still has no job, and her friends let her down. Mongo is still employed at MovieCone, but has no friends at all. (#98) *Raoul presses Sphynx for a riddle, but she decides not to eat him then and there. PHG gets a job at T. J. McFraud's (#99) *PHG and Sphynx first meet at a bus stop. (#100) 2009 *Ethel Blackmore is working the streets. (#106) *Sphynx gets a lot of snail mail requests for her to eat specific people. She has the mailman put a stop to home delivery. (#111) *Devil #76 makes a run to Earth for cheap guitars. (#113) *Mongo finds the perfect apartment. (#118) *Justine inadvertently cycles Tim, a menswear salesman at Eaton's, through the entire evolutionary cycle of the human species at least once. (#120) *Owls steal PHG's 1998 Honda Civic and leave it in a tree. (#125, incl. mouseover) *Annaliese first meets PHG on the beach. (#125) *PHG's automotive budget is rescued from the clutches of Big John McCrook by the brave efforts of a field operative with Vendeurs Sans Frontieres (VSF). (#128) *Mongo, PHG and Ethel all suffer various existential crises while standing in the same checkout line at ShiteMart. (#129) *"Implausible Premise XVIII", "White People Remake of an Asian Film Even Though We Claim To Live in a Post-Racial Society", "Got Too Much Money", "Expelled 2: Jonas Salk Was a Pedophile Nazi Cannibal", "I Love You, Alice B. Sheldon", and "The Hobbit" -- in theatres. (#130) *Sphynx meets Blue-Haired Boy at a bus stop, and he strikes up a conversation. She dismisses human free will, and backs destiny and genetic programming. (#130) *World's Worst Dating Service opens for business. (#131) *Raoul takes Devil #76 out for a big first date at T. J. McFraud's. PHG is on bile refill duty. (#135) 2010 January 1 - Raoul and Shamus make a bet about whether Selma Hayek would look beautiful no matter what she wore. (#140) *Shamus hosts the 1st Annual Beautiful Women in Unnecessarily Terrifying 19th Century Atmospheric Diving Suits Fashion Show, and wins the bet. Shortly afterwards, he and Raoul travel time. (#140) *PHG sikes a couple would-be porn producers at table 6. (#141) *Anneliese first meets Zoe Muggs outside of Often's. (#144) *Sphynx nearly accidentally hits PHG with a police car when she flings one several thousand meters. (#145) *The Neo-Nazi time travellers unleash Ronald Reagan and Margaret Thatcher upon the world... in their TRUE FORMS. (#146) *PHG and Sphynx meet at a bus stop for the second time. Sphynx saves PHG from being run over, and the implications of this terrify her. (#150) *Sphynx lashes out over food ethics at the poker table. (#154) *PHG quits T.J. McFraud's and regains her pink hair by will alone. (#155) *Justine inadvertently launches a fellow lawn care dork into permanent exile in Dimension ?XJQ, startling observers. Let the log show that she keeps his Lions hat. (#159, incl. mouseover) *PHG cannot make it home due to the arc of Zeno's Arrow being measured in nice but divided by stupid. (#160) *Devil #76 has another date. (#163) *Justine encounters the Museum of the Theoretical. (#166) *A Bitter Old Frogmouth proves to PHG that she can say no. When Raoul first approaches her, she does. (#167) *Sphynx's quest to understand home heating leaves her homeless for Christmas (#168), which she doesn't know much about either. PHG finds her over a heating vent at a bus stop, and challenges her to friendship which she determines to accept. (#169) 2011 *PHG is looking for a job again, and Anneliese and Marie wonder about apologizing to aliens. (#171) *Ethel is stalked by a fictional horror. (#173) *PHG is stalked by two. (#176) *PHG discovers a potential future at Wardair International Airlines. (#177) *Devil #76 sets up a repeat date while Cold War luminaries struggle with eternity. (#178) *Anneliese and Marie fantasize about rock 'n roll. (#179) *Ethel first meets Mark. (#181) *Bernard™ opens a new venture, Dating Roulette. (#182) *Sphynx and PHG hang out in the town square, and many things are explained as they watch the people go by. (#184) *"Beauty and the Bees" in theatres. ([#184) *On a date with the fellow from VSF (#186), PHG is summoned to the throne of the Emperor of the Universe. The secret of memorable humiliation is gleaned from her mind before she is returned to her date. (#187) Something about events being rearranged retroactively by someone we've never heard of. *Annaliese and Marie consider the chaos butterfly, with inconclusive results. (#189) October 31 - Sphynx, PHG, Justine, Devil #76, Shamus and Raoul all wind up at the same Halloween party. (#190) *Justine finds "The Nuclear Weapon Databook" at Bluebird Books. She and the owner consider improvements to common metaphors. (#192) November *PHG completes her training as a flight attendant. (#193) December *Sphynx determines the perfect Christmas gift for PHG, who is amazed thereby. (#193) 2012 14 February - Ethel receives a valentine from a secret admirer. (#195) *Students from nearby Alpha Centauri query Zoe, PHG, Sphynx, Justine, Raoul, T-Shirt Girl, Bitter Old Frogmouth, Voice Over Lady, General Pete, and Mongo about life on Earth. Anneliese and Marie speak to one while their time-travelling elder selves look on. Meanwhile, the students' warp-capable transport is carjacked. (#196) 2018 {Suzy builds an Elvis robot to undo the evil creation of her youth.} (#90) c. 2030s? *Anneliese and Marie discuss the advice they give their daughter. (#152) 2066 *General Pete dies. (#196) 22nd Century *Sometime after 2127, the Neo-Nazi time travellers are reduced to begging for pengos. (#117) *Some Christmas after 2130, Bruno Menderes of the Galactic Defense Force tells Eunice, an employee of SexStop, about the biocide of Wonte IV. (#138) 2162 June 9 - The President is sentenced to time travel to the past to watch terrible movies because he lost a bet requiring his entire English-speaking country to use faux-Elizabethan oration for all conversations for a year. (#126) 26th Century *Human cloning is on demand, and sex in public is de rigueur. (#58) 27th Century *Calling women a total f*cking bitch is strictly frowned upon. At least on the Moon. And there are robots. (#58) Undated elsewhere in "THE FUTURE" *As result of George W. Bush being ineligible for a third term as President of the United States, humans become genetically fused with cats. (#35)